Wanzology

Being A Complex Human

 Ooh, bop she bam, buh-duh, buh-duh, uh, uh, happy Wednesday. I hope you are happy to have made it to the mid part of the week. This is your host of WANZOLOGY, The Wanz saying, YO!, what's going on? How are you doing? I really appreciate you listening and, uh, would encourage you to spread the love. Tell people about this podcast!! Tell them the good things. Don't tell them the bad things. Okay. As long as we understand each other. Excellent!!
All right. Uh, we are still coming down to the end of it. I think there's like three or four chapters in #THEBOOKOFWANZ left. Um, I really liked this one: warning. BEING A COMPLEX HUMAN BEING CAN MAKE IT DIFFICULT TO RECOGNIZE OR ACCEPT THE SIMPLE.

Humans are smart. Even the dumbest of us are somewhat intelligent. And because we're smart, we tend to figure things out. As teenagers, we always want to go and do different things. Sometimes, without regard for the consequences. Some of us get into trouble. Some of us don't. As we get older and learn more, we tend to analyze. We use our big brains to find solutions to challenges. This is all fine and good until we make that one decision that leads us down a path where we end up worse than we were before. Humans are also competitive by nature. No one likes being the last one. No one likes making mistakes. It reflects badly on who we are or does it?

I've lost count of how many difficult situations I've gotten myself into because I chose the really complicated solution. I could have gone the easy route, but would tell myself, I'm college educated. I've lived a while and know some things. Only to find myself in a dead-end alley after making that last turn. Only then, while backing myself out do I realize that there was a simpler solution I should have chosen. I learned. We all do! Keep in mind that just because you think you know some things, doesn't mean you know everything.

Learning comes from making mistakes. Some of these mistakes are small, like falling off a bicycle or wearing mismatched socks. Some mistakes are bigger, like missing a ride or backing into a pole with your car. Other mistakes are huge, like having unprotected sex and getting pregnant. Or, robbing a store. All of these mistakes were solutions that looked correct before we acted on them. Then we find out they weren't the right move.

Enter the ‘K.I.S.S. Theory’. KEEP IT SIMPLE, STUPID. The simple answer is usually the best and easiest answer. Even though it may not be a long, drawn out solution. I've found that if I can make the problem simple, the answer usually is just as simple. Think about it. How many of your past problems became huge quadratic formulas that needed hours or days of deep contemplation to solve. Then later, you find the answer was as easy as 2 plus 2. More times than not, if you can make a problem simple, the right answer will be as well.

I like that. Humans tend to make things as complicated as possible. Not on purpose, but just things end up that way, and I think the reason that they end up that way, we get very, very, very happy about how much we know. We get very, very happy about how smart we are, how knowledgeable we are, how we're able to like solve all these challenges and problems. But the thing that we forget is that we're human and when you're human, well, let me tell you. It's very easy to get caught just, I don't know, sleeping on the job. Everything looks honky-dory. You've gone where you've wanted to go. You're with who you want to be with. Everything's going just fine. until it's not. Now, you want it to go back to where it was, but you can't really do that because nobody goes backwards in this world. Time only moves forward, but after thinking about it a while, you come up with a solution. And that solution probably got four or five steps might even involve two or three people. When the simplest, most direct solution would have been to say, “oops, I'm sorry.” No big drawn out defense, no big Perry Mason or Matlock or Law & Order type explanation.

Simple. “I messed up. I'll try not to do that again.” If it's a big thing, I would recommend throwing in the, “…is there anything I can do to, like, make this right?” Especially when you've hurt another person. That's a great thing to throw in there. “How can I make this right? How can I make it up to you? Take your time and let me know.” Sometimes it's relatively easy to do that. Sometimes you get the, “Nah, that's okay, I get it, I understand.” Other times it's not as simple. Because you stepped in it. You caused pain. You caused discomfort. And some people really, really are into, uh, extracting a penalty for doing that to them, and you have to take it, man, woman, take it, just take it, move on, don't sit there and like, try to negotiate, don't try to, “oh, well, you know, it was this, this, this, that…’ no, no, no, no, no, somehow, I remember being told, The difference between a response and a reaction is time. If you take the time to understand what has happened, then you're going to respond rather than just react emotionally. Your chances are better that you won't react emotionally.

If you're going in for a raise, make sure that you have your ducks in a row and have documented evidence of what you've done. Why you think you should be paid more. It's not that you deserve it, that's, duh, no brainer, but to be able to show why you deserve it, well, that increases your chances tenfold. If you have already done the research, already mapped it out and said, “yeah, for this three months I did this, and then I moved up a little bit, and then for the next three months I did this, and then I moved up a little bit, and one month I got distracted and kind of fell down, but I came back, and then here we are at the end of the year.” It's more for you than it is for It's good to know what you've done. It's good to realize where you came from and how you got to where you are. All of us come from back there somewhere in order to get to here, where we are. And then we have to go through this here part until we go to there, wherever that is.
Yeah, it just doesn't make a difference where it is. It's just, it's going to happen.

In the meantime, which is my biggest challenge. I never know about in the meantime, I can rarely ever decide what I'm going to be doing in the meantime, while I'm waiting for other solutions to either take effect. or, the answer to come.

I don't figure everything out, like, right then and there. As a child, that's how I made the wrong decision and said the wrong thing to the wrong parent, and all of a sudden, mmm, he's getting a whoopin or, backhand, or, something that I really didn't want. You know what I mean? Instant regret. I shouldn't have said that. Oops, I'm so pshh. No, doesn't matter. Sorry. I had a friend of mine tell me once. One of the best lessons you can learn is restraint of pen and tongue. And we also extended it to keyboard. Restraint of pen and tongue and keyboard. Meaning that you could read something and think something, but just because you think it doesn't mean that you have to say it, and that works on the internet, that works at your job, that works at your home with your family. Works anywhere. You might know the right answer, but just because you think you know, doesn't mean that you have to tell anybody. Another situation is, just because you're wrong, doesn't mean I have to tell you you're wrong.

There are people who really don't like being told things they already know. I'm one of them. I hate that. I mean, I hate being told stuff that I already know. “You know, if you don't put on a raincoat, you're gonna get wet when you go outside in the rain.”
“Really? Uh, thanks.”

Sometimes things are really obvious, but only to you. This is a really hard lesson to learn, because, I mean, sometimes people will just innocently ask, “Well, didn't you see?”, “Don't You Remember?”, “Didn't you hear about?”, “Didn't you already know?”, and sometimes that answer is no. And they look at you funny. And you kind of feel dumb, at least I do. I'm working on, I mean I'm working on trying not to get defensive and feeling like I have to strike back and I'm on the witness stand and I have to, I have to rebut. Because I forget a lot of things. I've been forgetful since I can remember. Kind of funny that I said it that way, isn't it? “Take out the trash, Michael.”, “I forgot.”, “Feed the dogs, Michael.”, “I forgot.” That's how I lost the first pets that I had. I forgot one time too many and my mom, she didn't like coming behind me and doing the thing that I was supposed to do, so she got rid of our dogs. She didn't have to do it on my birthday. That was kind of harsh. But what was the lesson? If you can't take care of something, you probably shouldn't have it. Took a long time, long time for me to get over the lack of confidence being able to take care of a thing. Plant. Pet. It took a while. But I figured it out. I figured it out in the sense that the older I got, the more sense other things made, like I don't have to play in the street right now, I can feed the dog, which will take, I don't know, two minutes, and then go play in the street.

I tell my kids…still, don't do it later, do it now!! Whatever it is, do it now, because later, you want to be doing something else…and that's real, since life only moves forward. You gotta be ready for what's coming. More times than not, you don't know what it is. How can you be ready for something you don't know what the hell it is? Be prepared, son. Always be prepared. If you're hungry, the simplest thing would be to eat something. If you're thirsty, the simplest thing might be to drink something. If you're lonely, the simplest thing might be to go somewhere and be with other people. But we tend to make all those things really complicated, “I don't know what I want to eat, so complicated. I just had that yesterday. I don't know what I want to eat. Uh, uh.”, “I don't know where I want to go. Last time I went there, uh, it was bad. It was ugly. The music was terrible.”, “Uh, I don't like that. I don't want to drink that. Uh.”, I'm a guy who doesn't like chocolate. I'm a mutant and I know it, but I'd wear it as a badge of honor. I don't know how it is that I came to not like chocolate. I think it had something to do with when I was a teenager and I associated eating chocolate with getting pimples and I didn't want to get pimples. It was just easier for me to say, “no, I don't like it.” Rather than give this long drawn out explanation of how the oils on my face tended to pool in pores and would get stuck there and cause a pimple. It's just easy to, “no, no thanks. No chocolate chip cookies for me, I'm not really that big a fan of chocolate”, as I turn around and unwrap a Snickers bar, and nibble all the chocolate off the side, so that I can get to the caramel and peanuts, and nibble all that off, so I can leave the best part, which is the nougat! Ha ha ha ha! Candy bars with nougat rule. Can't get me off of that one. I'll argue that one to the death.

Simple. Even trying to do the simplest thing is complicated. You ever try to get uncluttered? You ever try to get unbusy? You have so many things going on, I just think I need to take a break. I just need to take a break. Man, I've spent more time trying to relax, or at least get enough things done that I can leave them alone, than I can swing a stick at. I'll usually just end up on the couch watching television. Which is fine. Most of the things that I need to do, don't need to be done in the next ten seconds. So evaluate where you're at, because I betcha, there are things that you really want to do, and there are things that you have to do. Part of being an adult, is to be able to tell the difference. The difference between being a grown up and still being a kid, grownups do the things that they have to, then they go do the things that they like.

It's true. That's what they teach us. All parents teach us the same thing. Do this, so you can get that. And when you grow a little older, and you get to be like 16, 17, you go find a job and they tell you to do this, so you can get that paycheck. And then you're off to the races. You figure out different things that you can do so that you can get the amount of pay that you want. That's why people go to college or trade schools, but it's still the simple, if you do this, you want to be compensated for the time and effort it took to do that. And whether that's laying on the couch and watching a baseball game, or making bacon and eggs at 7:30 at night, or sitting and watching the sunset, doesn't matter.

Life is circumstantial. When you understand your circumstances, It is so much easier to move and not get caught thinking yourself into a circle. Cause I hate that. I don't know. Well, maybe if, well, I don't know what that's gonna be. I don't know what's gonna happen. No one does. No one knows the future. Get over it. Do what you think is right. And if you screw up, oh well. I just got my new shirt. It's dope. “Either I win or learn, I never lose.” I think it says “I never lose. Either I win or I learn.” Either way, I'm trying to find these lessons in things that I thought I already knew, and as an adult, things keep coming up over and over again, dressed in different clothes or with a different paint job on a different day, whether in the weather's different. You get to a certain point in your life, and it's like, Well, I've seen this before. I've felt like this before. What'd you do the last time? Complicated? Simple. Pick one. It's up to you. Never forget, you are driving your own boat.

Ha ha ha. Yeah, man. Let that rattle around in your head for a little bit.

Consider this. The most dangerous place on the planet for any of us is the four inches between our ears, where the brain resides. Good luck with that, and I, The Wanz will see you next Wednesday. Thanks for being here. Like I said, don't forget to tell somebody about the podcast and oh yeah, #THEBOOKOFWANZ is still available at Amazon.com.

Thanks y'all. Peace and hair grease!!