Wanzology

Sometimes You Just Never Know 

Hey, hello. How are you? Welcome to another episode of WANZOLOGY. I am your host, The Wanz and I'm happy that you're here. Happy, happy, happy. Yes, sir. Yes, sir. Okay. So, uh, I hope you're, uh, having a great day of it and I'm going to read another chapter from #THEBOOKOFWANZ still available at your Amazon.com.

All right. This chapter is entitled: SOMETIMES YOU JUST NEVER KNOW. SO MAKE YOUR BEST GUESS.

Knowledge is power. The more you know, the more you can do. This is one of the simplest truths my father taught me. Knowledge doesn't always come from the classroom, nor is it always in the lessons our parents try to teach us. Contrary to popular belief, you are much more than what you know because no one knows everything. When faced with that numbing situation where you don't know the answer, guess. Why not? I'm quite sure Thomas Edison guessed many times after failing to invent the lightbulb, but he ended up being successful. He found the answer. Found. Found the answer.

When in doubt, guess. Even if you're wrong, you’ve eliminated one way not to do something. What have you got to lose? So what if you look stupid? Everyone does at some point in their life. Makes too much of a dent in your ego? Your ego will repair itself. I'm not sure you'll figure out some person or thing to blame your pain on, but God help you if you do. The road less traveled is sometimes because it's the wrong damn way to go. You may not find out till you're 10 miles deep in the woods and lost. Guess what? You'll have to come that same 10 miles back out. No shortcuts. They always take longer. Tis true, tis true, tis true. When in doubt, guess.

Now, you may be thinking that guessing is inaccurate, and “I'll be wrong”, or “I may not know”, or any one of a number of fears which to you may seem valid. But I'm telling you, if you've made it this far, you're somewhat of an educated human being. And you've had enough experiences at a lot of things that would give you license to guess.
I mean, there's not always going to be somebody around to ask. So you're going to have to figure it out. And if you're wrong, well, all you can do is admit that you were wrong and decide, “well, that's one way I shouldn't do it, I guess.”

What's wrong with guessing? What? You ever really ask yourself that question? What's wrong with guessing? All guessing is, is I am taking the information that I have right now, and I'm making a decision, and then you act on that decision and if it's wrong, well, it's wrong. Try again. Remember? Just like a toddler learns how to walk by falling over and over again, until they don't fall as much anymore, right?

We don't learn how to walk, we just learn how not to fall down anymore, not as much anyway.

So yeah, yes, you might be right. Left or right. Well, you have a 50-50 chance of being correct. Stay or go. Same thing. Yes. No. Same thing. When you have two choices. It's pretty easy. 50-50 shot. It gets more difficult the more choices you have. Say you're going to go and have dinner at a ‘Boo-Fay’, that's a buffet to you and me, but a ‘Boo-Fay’ where there's a myriad of choices. Different kinds of meats, different kinds of vegetables, starches, desserts, the whole nine. Where do you start? How much are you gonna eat? You don't know, but you gotta start somewhere, right? Some people start with dessert. They go and get dessert first, and they put it on their table, then they go back to get the main course, or a salad, or whatever. And then they sit down and eat the salad, and the dessert's already there. So it's like they started at the end, and work their way backwards. That's one way of doing it. Usually I start with the meat because I'm a meat guy. I like meat. So if there's like roast beef, I'm probably going to get that, and if there's seafood, I'm probably going to get some of that, and everything else is, what do I feel like eating? Macaroni and cheese? Nah. How about rice? Nah. Mashed potatoes? Yeah, a little bit. Gravy? Gravy? Gravy. Gravy! Well that means you have to have a biscuit if you're gonna have gravy. You see what I mean? You figure it out. but you have to start. You can't just stand there. Nothing comes to those who wait. You have to make a decision and then you have to go.

Remember the first time you ever dove off the diving board at a pool? Not the high one, just the regular one. Did you just run and jump off the first time? Or did you go to the edge and then figured out, Oh, now I'm out here now. Now I have to, or did you go all the way out there and decide, nope, not doing it, not doing it? Nothing wrong with any of those options. Not a thing. You're the one that has the knowledge. You're the one driving your own boat. How much do you believe in what you know? How much do you believe in what you've done and what you've learned? Only you can answer that question, because I guarantee you, the world is gonna present you with something new.
A place you've never been. People you've never met, situations you've never been in before, but I, I guarantee you, you'll have enough experience to say, “Huh, this kind of seems like…”, fill in the blank because you've been there before.

In recovery, when I was new, it was a question of how do I behave in a situation where there are other people who are drinking and I'm not going to drink. I was told, ‘act as if’, ‘fake it till you make it’. ‘Act as if’ meaning, well everybody has something in their hand that they look like they're drinking. Okay, find something to put in your hand. Whether you can drink it or not, as long as it's not something you know you're not supposed to drink. Or you're trying not to drink, but you act as, I'm just like everybody else. Thanks. Even though, inside, you know that you're not, you know that you're special, and if anybody questions, it’s none of the damn business. ‘Act as if’. I mean, I remember when I used to walk into clubs, just walk in, pass security and stuff, and a lot of times they wouldn't even bother to ask who I was ‘cause I walked in like I was supposed to be there. Or I say hi to the door guy, “Yo what's up?” And walk in. No questions, no answers. I'm in, later. Backstage? Sure. Security guys? Sure. But if you're supposed to be back there, “Ah, my lanyard's somewhere else.”. “Well, you need to go get it.”, “Yeah, but I'm only going to be back here for a second, just give me a minute!”, and you just keep walking. You know, if it's really bad, they'll chase you down and kick your ass out, but more times than not, they ain't got time for that. If you're supposed to be backstage, then you'll be backstage, and somebody else will find you ‘fan-girling’ or ‘fan-boying’ somewhere, someplace that you're not supposed to.

Never been to a certain club before? Never been to a restaurant before? Never been to a person’s house before? Never been on a date with this person before? All of it. All of it is giving yourself permission to not know. The answer. cause the questions are gonna come. Like I say in my song, Get Lucky, in the middle my only rap that I've ever written. “Chances will keep coming, sure as the sunrise every day. You can choose to sit and watch them pass, or you can grab what's yours to take. So have faith., and that's useful in so many situations. When you're not sure, but I guarantee you, odds are pretty good that even if you make the wrong choice, you won't It's not gonna kill ya, and if it's embarrassing, laugh like everyone else is. It takes a very, very strong human to be able to laugh at themselves.

I don't know everything, you don't know everything, no one knows everything. You wouldn't want that anyway, because all people would do is ask you about it, if you knew everything. Me? I pride myself on always having an answer to a question. That doesn't necessarily mean that I have the right answer, I have an answer. Now, my answer may or may not be the right one, so, like I said, I don't know everything, but I know what I know. And if it's something I don't know, if you ask me a question like, which subway do you take to get from Midtown to Battery Park? I have no idea. I'd have to look at a map in order to make an accurate decision, and accuracy is the key.

Have I ever told you about the difference between accurate and precise? Accurate is being in the neighborhood. Remember that saying ‘horseshoes and hand-grenades’? “It was close.”, yeah close, like horseshoes and hand grenades that don't have to necessarily be on the target to score points, so to speak. That's accurate. “I'll see you sometime next week.”. Accurate. “Looks like there's about two gallons in there.”. Accurate. “Maybe three hours from now.”. Accurate. “When's somebody gonna be back?”, “They said they'd be back soon.”, Accurate. But, if you wanted to be precise, “I will see you in the two o'clock hour next Tuesday.”, which is different from sometime next week. “How much is in there?”, “1. 78 gallons.”, “Well, I was close. I thought it was two gallons.” You see where I'm going with this? Precise is precise. Accurate is ballpark, and ballpark is good, because you don't always need to be precise.

Now, there are situations where precision matters, but in general, if an address says blah blah blah blah blah, north whatever, then you can see where the sun comes up, and the sun goes down, you know which way north is and you head that direction. That's accurate. When you start getting into numbers that somewhat match the address that you have? Even more accurate. When you reach the destination and the address matches what's in your little finder? That's precise. The whole idea is that if you're not sure, take a stab at it. You might be right. You never know. How much do you believe in what you know? You don't know everything, no one does, but I guarantee you, you may know more than someone else and they may know more than you. So this is kind of the revolving door that if someone doesn't know, maybe you do, and if you don't know, maybe someone else knows. And this is one of those ‘my pops used to tell me’ situations. If you're not sure, ask. He would always say, “You know a closed mouth don't get fed.”, and if you have a question, and it's rattling around inside your head like marbles, it's not really doing you any good, so ask if you're not sure, else, have a little faith in yourself and guess.

You could be wrong. Then again, you could be right. Sound good? Sounds good to me. The saying goes, “do your best, leave the rest”. Think about that one for a couple more minutes. Do your best, leave the rest. I like your chances because this is about hitting for average. This is not, “How many home runs can you hit?”, not, “How many times can you be right?”, it's a percentage, right? You're being graded on a curve. Make sure you know that and then just do the best that you can, and if somebody gets all hot under the collar because you messed up, that might be a clue of someone you don't need in your world anymore for whatever reason.

But that is another topic. We may cover at another time.

So, until next Wednesday, I am your host, The Wanz, and I will see you later.